To Brokenness

If I was completely honest with you, life sometimes sucks. I have been let down, I have looked down on myself, and I have been broken. But in that brokenness I have truth. I have the truth that there is Someone who will gather my broken pieces and put them back together. I am the clay and He is my Master. Sometimes I jump from His hand and find myself shattered on the floor broken over and over again. Often times people look at Christians as people who are free of all hurt, heart break and everything in between, but let me tell you a secret... They're not.

I have been saved for twelve years, which means I was seven at the time. At seven you play with barbies, you wear rain boots with your Easter dress and you just start understanding that sleepovers don't mean you are stuck there forever. So it's pretty obvious to understand that I had a very shallow view of Christianity. I thought that it not only was a ticket out of hell, but a ticket out of sadness, disappointment and tears. Boy, was I in for a surprise.

I thought that since I put my faith in Him that He would promise happiness. I felt entitled. I told Him without telling Him, "I asked You to be with me so You owe me a happy life". Honestly, I think in that He laughed a little. All I had to do was say "Jesus, I need You. I am broken, lost and hopeless without You." And I was saved. Meanwhile, God sent His son to die on a cross for who? Me. You. Your friends. Your teacher. Your enemy. And everyone in between. Jesus hung upon a cross because He wanted us. And I think I deserve happiness? He never promised a happy life. "I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33. I have been promised tribulation. I don't deserve happiness. I deserve death.

The beautiful thing about this fact is that He reached down to my scattered, broken pieces, picked them up and said "Be still and know I am God" Psalm 46:10. One of my lovely friends put it in such a beautiful way, she said, "I picture Him as a parent with their child. You know? When their kid is telling them all about their day and their worries and the parent cups their face in their hands and focus's the child's eyes on them and tells them 'It's okay. Be still.'" I love that picture she painted, because so often in our brokenness we develop these anxieties and we come to the Father with them like a small child. In all the chaos He cups His hands around our faces and redirects our attention on Him and tells us to just be still.

With those simple words He starts gluing us back together with gentle hands and a loving heart. Each time He glues us back together with our eyes fixated on Him He whispers another truth to us. And each time we find ourselves broken we start seeking His face sooner and sooner.

In no way am I saying that brokenness will be easier or less disappointing, but what I am saying is because we are promised brokenness we start to understand that He is still good, gracious and loving.


Fee - Everything falls Apart
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvjJ9TYA8cE


Psalm 55:22
"Cast your burden on the LORD, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved."