The Shipwreck and The Burg

 

Wow, my readers, it's been a little while since I have written a blog. If I'm honest, it's because this last year has been a huge series of ups and downs and I have been trying to get my bearings. I feel like for the past year that there was no possible way that I could pour out into a blog what I could barely put into words to our Creator. I was exhausted both spiritually and emotionally and felt like I was on an uphill climb without any gear. But, my dear friends, that's when God loves to move in beautiful ways and He did, as He always does.

A few days ago I moved to Virginia! All at once my 8th grade dreams were coming true, but more than that God's plan for my life was unfolding before me in the midst of a very dark season. He was that pinhole of light shining through; leading, directing, and comforting. I opened my prayer journal, that I haven't written in since October, and started writing for the Lord to burn a fire in me that can not be quenched, one that is so evident, one that proclaims His goodness. As I'm crying out to Him I look over at my last entry to read the words, 

"I feel a strong pull to Virginia but there are no camps hiring there. I pray that if you desire me there that you will make it abundantly clear. Lord, I'm trusting You, even if it doesn't make sense. Even if it means uprooting my life here to start over somewhere else. Lord, prepare me for all that you have for me. "

Excuse me while I sob my eyes out in my kitchen in Virginia! I think that's what's so sweet about writing out our prayers, we can tangibly see God at work. I didn't even remember that specific prayer, but I am so thankful that it was written down because it is so clear to see how faithful He is!

I just sat in awe. He really did make it abundantly clear. He really did make a way. It really didn't make sense (I literally agreed to live in a house out here before having a job... but, that's a blog for another day). He led and directed every step for me to be here! Wow wow wow.

As I began my devotionals in Acts 27, a passage that I have read many times before, the Lord started to reveal new things to me, as He always does. In both verse 7 and 8 Pauls trip was described to have been done with great difficulty. This voyage was not easy, it was extremely hard but as the passage continues it only becomes more difficult as they ignore Pauls warnings that continuing will cause damage and great loss, not only to the cargo but to their lives. Could God speak anymore clearly to me? I just left a job that I have no doubt would have caused me great loss not only to my emotions but also to my spiritual life! I slowly felt myself slipping further and further from a desire for the Lord because I started to become stagnant -- have you been there, too? 

This is when verse 13 comes in, the NASB words it so well, "When a moderate south wind came up, supposing they already attained their purpose, they weighed anchor and began sailing along Crete, close inshore." Did you catch that? When they thought they had already attained their purpose! Woah. This suck out so heavily, this was me, working a job that I 'went to school to get' so obviously this is where God wants me, right? I thought I already attained my purpose, and yet I couldn't have been further from it! My reader, I'm praying that you do not weigh anchor when you suppose you have reached your purpose, but that you wait until you have reached your purpose!

During the storm they begin to throw cargo overboard to lighten the boat and prevent the sinking, this is when we approach a verse that I think every Christian should underline, chew on, and weep over, verse 20 "Since neither the sun nor stars appeared for many days, and no small storm was assailing us, from then on all hope of being saved was abandoned" Just sit in that for a moment: the darkness caused them to lose hope in being saved. This can come in two fold -- non-christians that feel as though they are too far for Christ to have died for them too and Christians who are battling with the consequences of the fall!

As we round to home base, there is one more verse that I want to point out (let's be real... I want to point out everything, but for the sake of those of you who are still reading I won't). Once the storm breaks, after they cast anchors, cut ropes, break bread, and give thanks (verse 21-38) that's when we see verse 39. A verse that is the ultimate Coda to the past Crescendo -- when the sun rose they could not recognize the land. They were in a place the Lord directed them to, one they did not plan for or were familiar with. They were in a new place. Though this parallel to my current life, I think that it can speak to all of us:

There will be moments in your life when you are wishing for daybreak, the sun and stars may be hidden for many days or maybe even years, you might even lose hope in ever being saved. This might even be you right now. My sweet friend, daybreak will come and when it does you will not recognize the land. The storm will be a marker of God's goodness and faithfulness. He is good, He is gracious, and He will be faithful until the end. 

I'm so excited to see what the Lord has in store. You, my reader, are so loved.